The sounds your compiler makes
Imagine if you could hear the sounds your various language compilers make as they compile your code:
Sounds like a drill sergeant in a bad mood, constantly shouting that you have to go back and do it again.
No recognizable words, just periodic shouts of childish glee.
A quiet knowing chuckle every time it compiles a particularly devious piece of code, with an occasional snort of derision when it finds anything it considers overly verbose.
Moans of despair, interspersed with sobs of "Why me? ... why me? ..."
Periodic demands to insert another $10 to complete your compilation.
Constant complaints about the youth of today. Drools.
Says some very interesting things, but to understand them you have to record them and then play them backwards.
Repeats "Why am I even here?" ad nauseam.
Impressive sounding remarks which on closer inspection turn out to be mostly gibberish, with an occasional maniacal cry thrown in for no apparent reason.
The sound of one hand clapping.
Speaks very slowly and very intelligently, but only in Portuguese.
Makes very pertinent observations, expressed with perfect grammar and in a charming mid-Atlantic accent.
Prone to long periods of quiet introspection and also laughing at its own jokes.
Speaks fast using lots of abbreviations but never finishes a sentence. However, it does it in rainbow colors.
Recites the complete works of William Shakespeare UNION Christopher Marlowe UNION Ben Johnson, but with the lines all mixed up.