I have collected some witty "Getting older" observations sent to me by friends and relatives:
I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.
Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.
I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
SENIOR DRESS CODE
Many of us "Old Folks" are quite confused about how we should present ourselves. We're unsure
about the kind of image we are projecting and whether or not we are correct as we try to conform
to current fashions. Despite what you may have seen on the streets, the following combinations
DO NOT go together and should be avoided:
1. A nose ring and bifocals
2. Spiked hair and bald spots
3. A pierced tongue and dentures
4. Miniskirts and support hose
5. Ankle bracelets and corn pads
6. Speedo's and cellulite
7. A belly button ring and a gall bladder surgery scar
8. Unbuttoned disco shirts and a heart monitor
9. Midriff shirts and a midriff bulge
10. Bikinis and liver spots
11. Short shorts and varicose veins
12. Inline skates and a walker
And last, but not least . my personal favorite:
13. Thongs and Depends
Please keep these basic guidelines foremost in your mind when you shop.
Publison
Posts: 12,366
Comments
I have collected some witty "Getting older" observations sent to me by friends and relatives:
- I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.
- Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
- Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
- In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
- I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
- Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
- Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.
- I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
SENIOR DRESS CODEMany of us "Old Folks" are quite confused about how we should present ourselves. We're unsure
about the kind of image we are projecting and whether or not we are correct as we try to conform
to current fashions. Despite what you may have seen on the streets, the following combinations
DO NOT go together and should be avoided:
1. A nose ring and bifocals
2. Spiked hair and bald spots
3. A pierced tongue and dentures
4. Miniskirts and support hose
5. Ankle bracelets and corn pads
6. Speedo's and cellulite
7. A belly button ring and a gall bladder surgery scar
8. Unbuttoned disco shirts and a heart monitor
9. Midriff shirts and a midriff bulge
10. Bikinis and liver spots
11. Short shorts and varicose veins
12. Inline skates and a walker
And last, but not least . my personal favorite:
13. Thongs and Depends
Please keep these basic guidelines foremost in your mind when you shop.
Thanks Duane and doggiedoc!
I found an interesting web site if anyone wants to see what famous people share your birthday:
Calendar of Famous Birthdays
And Tycho Brahe!
I share my birthday with Molloko, the first California condor conceived in captivity.
I think Obituaries should be documented by the person that died, then there's no room for error.
Yeah, and Abbe Lane, Lee Remick and Patty Duke